Before my daughter was born, we knew she was a girl and we were so excited. In preparation for her coming, we wanted her room to be perfect. We pulled up the old carpet and painted the room a bright, happy pink. We decided that instead of putting down carpet, I would hand crochet a rug for her room. I was so excited as I envisioned her a toddler, happily playing on this big, beautiful rug.
Getting Started
I did a lot of research before I started crocheting. I couldn’t find any patterns showing exactly what I had in my mind. Several resources that I found online explained the basics. So I decided just to dive in and give it a try.
I secured a crochet hook the size of Texas.
I bought 17 girly colored bed sheets at thrifts stores and ripped them into 1” pieces to make the rags. I knew a little bit about crocheting, but I had never done anything to this scale before. But I could envision the end result in my mind and I was excited.
So I started crocheting.
It started off great. I crocheted a lot during my free time, thrilled at each little step of progress. As the rug grew bigger and bigger, I would periodically lay it out on the floor to make sure it was lying flat and to admire the colors.
The Problem
At first it was lying flat on its own. But after a little while, I noticed that I would have to adjust it a bit to get it to lay flat. It didn’t bother me too much because with a little stretching and prodding it would eventually lay flat.
Then as I got further along Brandon started noticing. He joked that it was a sombrero because that’s the shape it was turning into.
I insisted it was fine. Hoping deep down that the problem would work itself out. Besides I could get it to stretch and lay flat. Plus the baby was coming soon, so I kept right on crocheting, anxious to get it done.
Much to my chagrin, as the rug got bigger and bigger, the problem near the beginning never went completely away. As I went along I discovered how to adjust my crochet to add more stitches to help it lay flat, but the center was still just this weird sombrero shape. I told myself it was fine. I didn’t have time to change it before the baby got here. Plus I could just work at it and it would eventually lie flat. It would be just fine.
She’s here!
Well that sweet baby girl arrived and the rug got done. It decorated her room and it was beautiful.
There was still that problem near the center, but with lots of pushing and prodding I had made it lie flat so no one noticed.
No one but me.
As time went on the cute little baby grew into a little toddler girl and my dreams of her playing on the beautiful rug became a reality.
The Bump
But as you know, over time things get dirty. And the beautiful rug was no exception. Bits of dirt started to collect on the rug and finally it was time to give it a good wash.
Because of the size of the rug, I couldn’t wash it in my washing machine so down to the laundromat we went. Into the biggest washer. It came out nice and clean and I was thrilled. That is until I went to put it back onto my daughter’s floor and it would no longer lay flat. This time, the sombrero shape stubbornly held and I was left with a rug with a big old bump in the middle.
I told myself that it would be okay. That it would flatten over time.
But it didn’t.
Months of waiting and patiently trying to adjust it periodically were fruitless. Now when my daughter was playing on that big beautiful rug, she would constantly trip over the bump.
All of that work, I told myself.
What should I do?
I lived with the bump in the rug for a lot longer than I care to admit. Not only was it an eyesore, but a tripping hazard too.
The Epiphany
Then a few months ago I was talking to a friend and she showed me a beautiful afghan she had crocheted. It was huge and gorgeous and probably took her hours to make. But it wasn’t quite what she wanted. She told me of her plans to rip it out and remake the afghan. She spoke of her plans with excitement as if she was embarking on an adventure rather than just fixing a mistake.
Well that was just the encouragement I needed.
Take Two
I went home that night and started the process of fixing the mistake that I should have fixed when I first noticed it, years before.
I spent several hours painfully ripping out the stitches. Then carefully washing and drying of all of the rags. Then hours of rewrapping the rags into balls that I could crochet with. Finally I was ready to start over.
Before I started crocheting, I did a little more research, hoping I could find out how to fix what I did wrong the first time. And I found some new ideas.
I started out confident that I knew what I had done wrong. Then after several hours of crocheting (over several days), I got to a point where I lay the rug flat and noticed that same sombrero shape.
But instead of proceeding like I did before, this time I stopped and ripped it all out, did more research, and started again.
Again and Again
I wish I could tell you that I learned quickly, but the process was slow and laborious. Crocheting 8 or 10 rows around and then ripping them all out again. Trying something new and repeating that over and over again. A few times I got further along before I noticed a problem so it was 20 or 30 rows I had to rip out.
My husband starting teasing that my rug project had become my “Opus Magnus”. My life’s work. My contribution to the world.
But for me it had become more than just about the rug. It was about completing something that I wanted to master. About the process of learning and creating and teaching myself. It didn’t matter how long it took, I was willing to invest the time to learn.
I sought as many resources as I could. Got advice from others. Some advice I took, some I discarded. Some advice worked, most did not.
Once after receiving some advice, I tried a method I had never tried before. I almost got clear to the end of the rug before I noticed that even though it was lying flat, it was no longer the beautiful rug I had envisioned. It was a different rug than I was trying to crochet. So once again it got ripped out.
Mastering the Rug
Each ripping process was painful. I was ripping out hours of work. But I soon realized that each stitch that I crocheted, whether it got ripped out or not, was an important step in the process of mastering the rug.
As Thomas Edison said (On being asked how he felt about repeatedly failing to design a working light bulb.)
I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.
In a similar way, I learned many dozens of ways to not make a rug.
Finally after crocheting the rug over and over –I stopped counting how many times– I finally landed on a formula that worked well and I was able to complete the rug to my satisfaction. Not only did it lay flat, but it was even more beautiful than the first rug I created.
It now sits in my daughter’s room and brings me joy every time I see her happily playing on it.
It’s not perfect.
It will still get dirty.
And who knows if I’ll have to remake it again someday. But that’s okay.
Meanwhile I am loving it.
What I learned
As I’ve thought about my experience with mastering the rug, I’ve realized that this experience is much like the process of life.
- Failure is a part of life and the sooner we learn to embrace it, the better.
- Often we think that the mistakes we make will just go away on their own, instead of taking the time and the necessary steps to fix those mistakes. Like the bump in the rug, over time the mistakes become bigger, causing us to trip and fall.
- Don’t wait. It would have been a lot easier for me if I had fixed the sombrero issue the very first time I made the rug. I wouldn’t have had to spend the hours washing, and rewrapping all of the material. Plus the years in between that I had forgotten the process that I ended up having to relearn.
- Like my friend, we can be the encouragement for others to help them fix their mistakes and accomplish their goals in life.
- Just because we fix one mistake, doesn’t mean that the rest of life will go easy. Dozens and dozens of mistakes had to be corrected and reworked before I was able to master the rug.
- Finally, God is the great Master creator of our lives. He has a plan for us that is more beautiful than we can imagine. If we can submit to the painful process of ripping and reworking and ripping again, eventually we will become what we are meant to become.
Well that about wraps things up for this Saturday snippet, my friends. I’d love to hear your thoughts. What’s your biggest hurdle right now you are trying to master?
I’ll be back on Monday with another great recipe. “See you” then.
